bad dreams

[lotty]

I have always been scared off flying. Mainly take off but I have recently had a bad dream involing a flight I am taking in a couple of weeks. I was desperate not 2 get on the plane but had no choise, I was on the return from trip - ldn to belfast and suddenly found myself on the plane. It was almost skimming the water. Next thing I was in a car and chatting away as I had made it home and was so so happy. I am now really worried this will come true but the plane will crash. Has anyone else had this and if so what did they do. I feel so scared and want to change my flight home but I think my boyfriend will thing I'm mad.
Any help or advice would be really welcome x

[Fay]

Hey Lotty

Yeah I dream about flying about once a month at least! My planes skim the ground too. I also have dreams about monsters eating me and all sorts of nighmares sometimes, but they don't come true. There is no reason why your dream will come true either. When has anyone's dream come true? Gosh last night I drempt I was naked in a public place! Lets hope that doesn't come true!

Your boyfriend wont think your mad. Share your thoughts with him and he can give you some support perhaps. Also everytme you have these thoughts, shout in your head 'NO' and think of something good about the flight. That's what I do and did last night when I was flying back from Lanzarote. Always shake the negative out your head and fill it with something good about the flight.

Don't worry. You'll be fine and keep us posted.

Fay






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[JessKa]

i think you have nothing to worry about, i have alot of dreams that im driving towards an t-intersection with a rock wall ahead of me and my brakes dont work, no matter how hard i push the car doesnt slow down and i wake up just before i hit the wall sweating and nervous, but im not scared of driving a car.... so i think its just because your mind is on the flight so ur dreaming about it. i have alot of dreams about flying too, but ignore them coz they are just dreams. just know that ur not alone, im heaps scared of takeoff too and i have a long flight from europe to mexico in 7 days and i cant stop thinking about it. but i always feel comfort in knowing that im not the only one with this fear...

[lotty]

Thank u so much 4 ur kind replies - I think its that thing of being totally out of control that scares me so much. And I just keep thinking what if I could do something to change it but ur replies have helped somewhat x I guess I will just have to try and go for it. I hate flying over water as I cannot really swim and also think there is nothing u can do if you land on water. Do you think this is the case?

[Captain Keith]

Hi Lotty and Jesska

If you're scared of the take off then keep watching the take off videos on this network and go to the fearofflying.com web site for more information. Being out of control is a natural feeling in an aeroplane for fearful flyers although being in a similar position on a train or coach doean't seem to apply...or is it because even at 70 mph on a coach you could get to the front move the driver take over the steering apply the brakes and stop safely?

Planes float when they land on water don't they? And don't all the passengers get off unharmed? Well that's what happened on the Hudson River!!

Choose the facts that will re-inforce the fact that flying is safe.


Ask me anything you like...I'm here to answer your questions and allay your fears.

Captain Keith

[lotty]

Thanks for your advice and support. Was feeling better but now scared again as I keep thinking I'm getting signs not to fly - which would sound completly crazy if I shared them!! If a plane does go down on the water though is there much chance of surviving? As, with the exception on the hudson crash, I would believe there was not. Thanks again for your help

[Captain Keith]

Hi Lotty

Why make the Hudson crash and exception...that's what happened...every one survived. Planes don't often ditch in the sea but the in the few that have there have been survivors. But why would your plane do that? Where's the evidence for believing it will happen to you?

The chances are that it won't happen to you...work on that idea. What ever you think are signs not to fly are more likely to be everyday events that YOU are turning into reasons not to fly.

Keith

[lotty]

I know you are right in my rational mind but I keep having this apsolute fear that it will happen and yes I am seeing signs all over the place!

I've just spoken to a friend who was an air hostess and she said she had bad dreams all the time when she was flying but just got on with it.

I then was talking to another friend with us and he said that bad things happen in threes. I.e air france & yeman. I feel completely anxious again. Would any of you cancel your flight if you were me?

I really dont know what to do for the best and need to find a way to calm down as I am so scared I am going to completly freak out on the plane.

[andyb99]

Hi Lotty, i'm totally terrified of flying but i'd never cancel the flight, on your superstition of bad things happening in 3's....my view is this...if there had already been 3 crashes this year would you not be afraid to fly??? course you would...or the 3 could be hudson, air france, yemen...so are you no longer afraid?? course you are.

you wont freak out, cause you will have decided to do it....and thats already controlling your fear.

any dont forget, you're more likely to get hit by lightning TWICE on the way home from buying a winning lottery ticket.......keep telling yourself that...it works for me.

[lotty]

Thanks so much - fantastic advice. I just want to relax and enjoy my time away and thinking logically will help!

[Captain Keith]

Lotty

Things don't really happen in three's any more than twos eights or sixteens or seventysixes...it's just that we make the numbers fit up to three then start counting again.

Go on the flight. You will not freak out on the plane . You only THINK you will.

It isn't a sign if a cat walks in front of you on the way to the dentist or if a paper bags blows across the street on a Sunday evening....things happen that have nothing to do with your flight. Promise you .

Captain Keith

[lotty]

You are completly right. Thanks so much becasue what you say makes perfect sense.

I will get on the flight and I know I will be scared but if I dont do it the fear will just get worse and I will keep giving into it.

[Captain Keith]

Good for you...that's the spirit!

I do understand how you feel of course. We all have little routines that make us normal, my mum always used to say things happened in threes but it was more conversation than fact.
Unfortunately when we have a fear these things assume special meanings and start to interfere with things that ought to be juudged more rationally.

Any way the fact is you're going to take your flight and face your fear...that's exactly the thing do do to get over it.

Imagine that I'm flying with you and supporting you and being proud of what you're doing....and if the flight turns out to be awful....don't fret...sit there and write me a note saying that I'm a cheat and people shouldn't listen to me and that I'm too old to know what I'm doing, and that I should be banned from helping people ...and get it off your chest!!

Have a wonderful time and my heartiest congratulations to you ...what you're doing is something to be proud of. Brave people are not only the ones that do brave things...but people who do ordinary things despite their fear.

Keith