Hi everyone, greetings from the U.S.A! I found this site awhile back and found it very helpful in a variety of ways - especially the videos. I am a long time intensely fearful flyer. I always feel so completely embarrassed, alone, and like a huge loser because flying gets me so upset - I am a wreck/mess for weeks and days before a trip. I absolutely fear taxiing/take-off and turbulence - everything about the sensations, speed, sounds, and loss of control makes me extremely, extremely anxious/upset/panic-y. Yet, I am able to calm down a bit once the plane levels off. In fact, with the help of this course, the last time I flew I actually did okay. Loss of control is also a big issue for me; I sometimes get mad at myself because I feel like I purposely put myself in harm's way by agreeing to go on a trip that requires me to fly.
Unfortunately, with my upcoming trip, I feel as though I am right back at Square One. I am a complete mess. I am having real trouble getting control of the horrifying thoughts that are running through my mind about what can happen to me or my family. I feel like such a baby. Furthermore, I have this terrible sense of foreboding which I cannot shake - I am dreading getting on the plane and I truly feel as though I shouldn't. Finally, I am afraid that I will be unable to calm down once the plane levels off and starts cruising. I am seriously doubting that I can make the trip this time. I keep reviewing the materials on this website, which helps me to calm down for a while (and which I plan on taking with me), but then I go right back to being a mess and a failure at flying.
I apologize for such a long, rambling post. I guess I thought I might feel better if I got things off my chest; as though somehow, by sending my story out there I wouldn't feel so alone (if that makes any sense?)