Hello

I've not flown since Aug 10. I've been busy having babies and have not had time to think about flying. However, we go on our first family holiday in 7 weeks!!

I have had successful flights thanks to support from Keith and co, but I have rituals I have to carry out when at the airport, boarding and taking off. I'm so worried now that I won't be able to carry them out what with having a 23 month old and a 8 month old in tow.

I like to do everything the same as my previous flights and now I feel scared something will go wrong if I can't or I will loose control if I can't kinda thing.

I also don't want my boys to see me in a state. Especially the eldest who is now very aware.

Who has flown with kids? One will be on my lap and the other on my Husbands lap. Do you think I will be too preoccupied to care?? I need to keep it together. I don't want this rubbing off on my boys and they end up frightened.

What the hell have I done booking this?! I booked in July 12, but now it's getting closer, reality has hit.

Any tips?

Fay

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Hi Fay

I've got tips for you. you've done this before and you know about all these 'demons' that appear. You also know that when you actually get on and do it , that things are never quite as bad as you think. 

So be courageous, like you have been in the past. You don't need the rituals ... you only think you do.

if what you say is true ... why did I manage to fly safely for all those years without having any?

But what about something in between ... settle for one or two rituals that you can do?

off on that holiday and enjoy it ... give me a ring   01420 588 628. It'll be good to hear from you again anyway. Do you remember the last time you called me? You've come a long way since then.

Keith

Hi Fay,

Firstly, congratulations on being a mum of two. Secondly, surely childbirth and having 2 children is scarier than getting back in plane!!!

Although I haven't got children I can understand why you are tense about the children seeing your anxiety,  but I can only imagine that protecting your children from something you are afraid of is the natural reaction of any good parent.

Try and focus on the good things, your first family holiday, being able to look back at the photos as the children grow earlier, the good times you've had when you have flown, That photo on your profile of you smiling on the plane!  When you think back to the flight we did for the DVD is it happy memories? It certainly is for me, it was a life changing day for me.

I know what you mean about the rituals, one of mine was too always get booked seats and sit near the front or pay extra on the budget airlines so you could have priority boarding. On my last flight to Austria this wasn't available so we just got what ever seats we were allocated at check in. But in all honesty it didn't bother me, on the return home I even forgot about the whole seat thing until we were getting onto the plane and we were in the 3 rd row from the back! 

I've now realised I quite like sitting in the back, you can have a good nose at what's going on and you get served your coffee quicker! 

Take care and keep in touch!!

Jim x 

Owww thanks Keith. Okay I will try and be courageous! But it's always an effort. I suppose we are never 'cured'. It's just mentally challenging and it's god damn tiring. Why do I put myself through this!! I need to focus. I think you're right. Perhaps one or two rituals might help me feel some control. I'm going to have a think about what I defo need to continue to do and what I can perhaps cut out on doing? I need a new plan now that my old plan won't work with the boys with me. Yes I remember our chats. It's what kept me going and helped me not chicken out! This has stuck with me from our conversation that day through the tears.....ME 'What if I panic and can't go through with it? What if something bad happens? What if I die? etc' YOU 'What if you have an amazing holiday? What if you meet the man of your dreams (I was single then)? What if you have fun and don't panic etc'. Oh yeah lol. It reminded me that all my 'What if's' didn't have to be doom and gloom. Change the 'What if's'! That really helped me to keep positive. I'm really trying again now Keith. Oh I'm frazzeled with all this thinking.

Hey Jim. Haha yeah the childbirth was pretty scary stuff, but you know what it's like when this flying thing rears its ugly head. It's been nice to be flight free for the last couple of years and not to have to think about it. Jim you saying then to think about looking back at the photos has hit me. Yeah how lovely will that be. I want them to have family holidays abroad and see that we had good times. I need to keep that in my mind too!! Lots of positive thoughts and not just bad stuff. Oh yeah defo a life changing day! Not had success until that day and since. So your rituals couldn't happen one time and you were okay? That's reassuring to know. If you can do it, so can I :) Gosh Jim you have come along way! Oh god, hope I'm okay? I'm just worried I'm gonna die. Arrgghh, stop it, stop it!! I'm so up and down. Gotta be strong! My friend had 6 holidays abroad last year. One to S.Africa too. She is on her 2nd holiday this year already too. She does it and is back each time safe. Then I go on twitter and follow my fave celebs and they are always jetting here there and everywhere. Well they bloody do it! Why do I have to be like this!? Up until I got this fear, I was so carefree. I went to Ibiza and Kavos with the girls and my Grandparents lived in Marbella and I was there every year. Even flew on my own aged 11 (with the flight crew looking after me) to see them. I mean what the hell went wrong??!! Where do these fears come from? I want to be the old Fay and not have to do go through this mental challenge every time :(

I'm waffling now and going crazy. Gonna get some sleep.

Keith, may well be taking you up on that phone call as departure day looms.

I had better get some of the knowledge back I have lost now that I'm back in the flying seat and scour this website over the next 7 weeks.

Night night x

Hi Fay,

That was a bit of a waffle! 

I think a few years ago I would have freaked a bit had I not been able to pre-book my seats and in all honesty I wouldn't have booked a flight where it wasn't an option to pre-book seats or get priority boarding but I am really getting to grips with the flights now I rarely get more nervous than a  3/10 ! ( can you believe it?). As I mentioned I actually quiet enjoyed being at the back of the plane, I'd never been passed the middle before so it was a whole different view, I rarely look out the window other than landing or take off.  I've still only done European flights though, about 2.5 hours is the longest but for now I'm happy!

Keep focusing on the positive things! 

x

I have found having my Chn with me a great help. U are distracted and kept busy. On one flight my son had an upset tummy and I had to leave the security of my seat and go to the loo so many times! It felt like the quickest flight I'd ever had!
Hi Tracey. Ah right okay so having them helped you? Yeah I'm kinda hoping it will me too??! I just don't know till I do it and then it's too late!

My e-tickets have just come through on my email and I feel really sick already :(

BE BRAVE! BE BRAVE!

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