Is there any hope for the scaredest person in the country who's petrified of flying? :0(

Simon

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I understand how you feel and what you're saying BUT things won 'ever get better until you stop talking like this. Even Mr Robbins would agree with that . If it 's help you want I'll help but my first tip would be to avoid emotional language because the outer voice is telling the inner you that you're scared There is no other way out of this fear. A hypnotist will persuade you to think like a fearless flyer. A cbt therapist will persuade you that what you think makes what you feel and how you feel governs the way you behave. Don't be influenced by the. Fact that my advice is free if you'd prefer to pay ... Then make a donation to Sight Savers for me
Let's beat this fear... Are you up for it?

Yeah I understand all that stuff Keith but the fear is sooooo strong it scares me to death. ( I know, did it again lol )

Do you know of any way I could do this in baby steps? Getting comfortable with each step of the journey rather than it having to be both feet first? Some thing like I don't know, doing some part it it time and again until it holds no fear....?

Simon



Captain Keith said:
I understand how you feel and what you're saying BUT things won 'ever get better until you stop talking lle this. Even mr Robbins would agree with that . If it 's help you want I'll help but my first tip would be to avoid emotional language because the outer voice is telling the inner you that you're scared There is no other way out of this fear. A hypnotist will persuade you to think like a fearless flyer. A cbt therapist will persuade you that what you think makes what you feel and how you feel governs the way you behave. Don't be influenced by the. Fact that my advice is free if you'd prefer to pay ... Then make a donation to Sight Savers for me
Let's beat this fear... Are you up for it?

Simon

OK lets start by getting you to agree that you you stand as much chance of overcoming your fear as anyone else.

Agreed or are we wasting time on something you don't want to do. I have infinite patience in helping BUT I can't make you do what you don't want to do.

It is a psychological fact that some people enjoy what's called a secondary gain, that is to say they get more from staying scared than doing something about it.

 I think you must consider your position in relation to this possibility. Are you defined by your fear. Would you lose sympathy from people if you addressed your fear. Who would you be without your fear?

I have suggested that you should see your favoured life style mentor if we can't help. 

So are you going to agree that you can address your fear? Secondly would you think you were getting better advice eif you paid.

Those two questions are your starting point for me.

If you can't answer them, then we are wasting each others time and you must try Mr Robbins.  

Keith

Simon I think you should answer the  points here after you have made a decision about the points in my last message 

They were in a previous message to you 

You admit you can't get on one that flies why not start on one that doesn't?

What are you prepared to do to overcome your anxiety? No one can persuade you to do something if you don't want to so the first question, despite everything you feel is  do you want to?

Second question is are you prepared to try?

Third question is what are you prepared to try?

Fourth question is who would you trust to help you?

Fifth question is a repeat of the first , do you want to overcome your fear?

There's no easy method that'll give you a long lasting fix. 

These questions aren't hard top answer ...

Keith

Morning Keith

We'll I don't gain any sympathy from this fear, trust me! It doesn't bring me any sympathy. I'm the only one it holds back. The only real reason I'm considering it is my greater desire to get to places quicker, and cheaper....after last years Rome trip. Also, my partner travels all over the world with work and pleasure. She occasionally keeps suggesting I fly.

1. I'm prepared to dip my feet in until each step I am comfortable with.

2. I am trying by being on this site.

3. I am prepared to try by following advice, slowly.

4. I would trust someone that does this for a living! Lol a pilot or the like.

5. I have not a great desire to over come the fear but I won't know unless I attempt it.

I am not on here attention seeking Keith. I just don't want to end up in the sea off the coast of china!

Si



Captain Keith said:

Simon I think you should answer the  points here after you have made a decision about the points in my last message 

They were in a previous message to you 

You admit you can't get on one that flies why not start on one that doesn't?

What are you prepared to do to overcome your anxiety? No one can persuade you to do something if you don't want to so the first question, despite everything you feel is  do you want to?

Second question is are you prepared to try?

Third question is what are you prepared to try?

Fourth question is who would you trust to help you?

Fifth question is a repeat of the first , do you want to overcome your fear?

There's no easy method that'll give you a long lasting fix. 

These questions aren't hard top answer ...

Keith

good job Jim, I have to fly tomorrow and I can't even pack, constantly sweating and crying, feel dreadful



Jim said:

The answer to your question Simon is YES. I Would have challenged you to your claim as the most frightened person in the country about 10 years ago. I wouldn't even talk about flying. Id go on detours so I wouldn't drive near airports. I missed holidays, my sisters wedding, got off a plane whilst it was sitting on the runway. But those days are gone. Im flying to Austria on Saturday to go skiing. This will be something like my 30th flight since I found this site and went on Keiths course. I have zero concerns about the flight. All I can think about is being on the slopes and a pleasant cold beer in the snow topped Alps. Its possible Simon. Everything is possible. You need to put the hard work in. My advice is take small steps, logging on to the site and posting on the forum is the first step. Congratulations. You are on the road forwards
Blimey, you're still that bad? I thought you was better now. You've done 30 flights!! You sound like I would be though lol



Ebony Rose said:

good job Jim, I have to fly tomorrow and I can't even pack, constantly sweating and crying, feel dreadful



Jim said:

The answer to your question Simon is YES. I Would have challenged you to your claim as the most frightened person in the country about 10 years ago. I wouldn't even talk about flying. Id go on detours so I wouldn't drive near airports. I missed holidays, my sisters wedding, got off a plane whilst it was sitting on the runway. But those days are gone. Im flying to Austria on Saturday to go skiing. This will be something like my 30th flight since I found this site and went on Keiths course. I have zero concerns about the flight. All I can think about is being on the slopes and a pleasant cold beer in the snow topped Alps. Its possible Simon. Everything is possible. You need to put the hard work in. My advice is take small steps, logging on to the site and posting on the forum is the first step. Congratulations. You are on the road forwards

Simon

Blimey, you're still that bad? I thought you was better now. You've done 30 flights!! You sound like I would be though lol

These comments may be how you feel and I've said that they do not help you, but you keep writing them, some people will find them counter productive.

Please post something that will help you rather than a constant dialogue of how you feel ... we've done that bit  now we need to move you on .

Keith

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