Leading up to my flight to Thailand I was getting increasingly snappy, anxious and nervous, but I kept going over the information I had learnt from the ebook and audio course. On the way to the airport I kept pinging my elastic band so much that my wrist got sore, it worked but then the neg thoughts kept creeping back in. My Mum and her partner stayed with me until the last minute, and then I went through the gates after a cry. It was due to all the anxieties building up and knowing I would be facing my biggest fear ever of flying but added pressure doing it alone. I told the crew this end that I was a nervous flyer and they were really good, and let me board first. I wasn't upgraded as the flight was full but I think they may have done another time. When I was sat on the plane one of the crew came and spoke to me he was really nice, and made me feel at ease. All the time I kept pinging my band and going over info in my head. I was asked to move seats but refused as I would of been in the middle and I'd specifically chosen an aisle seat so I had leg room and easy access to move, I felt guilty which occupied me for a bit. Then I just sat there and familiarised myself with where I was going to be sat for the next 12 hrs and thought well this is it. I occupied myself with a magazine so when we started to move I wasn't paying much attention, before I knew it we were up in the air, and you know what I really enjoyed myself. When things were going on I could justify them to myself such as noises, movements, signs etc.....and I must say I was not scared one bit, the only thing I found uncomfortable on the flight was the seats. By the time I reached my Dad in Thailand I was tired but very relaxed, so proud of myself, I could not believe I had overcome the fear of my lifetime. I had a fab holiday, but sometimes even though I'd had a great flight out some anxieties were creeping in about the flight home, so I had to wear my band on several days just to keep me in check, my main fear was " was I just lucky on the way out". By the time it came to me to go home I was confident but I was also exhausted, so neg thoughts were more prominent and harder to fight off. The staff Thailand end were not very nice, when I said I was a nervous flyer she just stared at me and did or said nothing, then the news came that we were delayed or could be cancelled. I was starting to get tears by this point as again I was alone but also running out of credit on my Thai phone and was worried I would be stuck and unable to contact anyone. I went off as they instructed and ended up having a massive panic attack in the toilet as I just felt so scared and alone, I also have bipolar so I am prone to exhaustion and anxiety . Anyway once I got it out my system I pulled myself together, got some food and then went back. Luckily an hour later we were boarding the plane. I believe this happened to me on the way back as I was not as well prepared as I was mentally, and physically as I was on the way out. This is obv due to the fact that Id had a fab but busy holiday, and was still prob a bit jet lagged, also as it was a night flight and was delayed I had been awake a lot longer than Normal. However again once we had taken off I was comfortable, happy, bit more turbulence this time but I didn't even take any notice of it, just tightened seat belt and got on with it. I actually was amazed at how calm I was on both flights. I realised the thought is worse than doing it so dont think about it in future. I also understand the importance of good mental, and physical health now for flying......it makes a massive difference in all aspects of the flight.
I would like to thank you Keith for a fantastic book, and audio course..it is the best money I have ever spent, I just can't believe I spent so much time and energy worrying about flying and to be honest there is nothing to it, like a walk in the park. The information you provide about flying and aeroplanes is absolutely amazing and I have wowed all my friends and family with my knowledge who now think I'm rather intelligent as I can answer any question they ask me about flying. I cannot thank you enough, your help changed my life!